1% Doubt and You’re Out!

1% Doubt and You're Out!

I've never been to a wedding where the groom looked into the eyes of his bride and said, "I Do! 99% of the time I will remain committed." Yet being 99% or even 50% committed to our goals is commonplace. It is so easy to justify to ourselves that when things get tough we can quit or sit around and hope things will get easier. So many marriages end in divorce these days because people are truly less than 100% committed to each other. The 1% doubt in the beginning grows into 2%, then 5%. And that's why I feel compelled to explain why you need to be 100% committed to your goals.

If you have been reading my blog, even for a little while, you know that I am all about setting goals. One of my more recent goals is to get in better shape. I had doubts that I would be able to accomplish this due to my lack of experience, discipline, and knowledge. I have had health problems for years. I have arthritis in my neck and wrists and I suffer from daily headaches because of my neck. I had some doubt that I could do this, not a lot at first but it was there. Unfortunately getting into better shape requires me to do two things: work out and make good decisions about what I eat. I need to change my mindset about food. My body needs energy and anything that I consume is simply fuel for my body and if I want to achieve my goal, I need to be fully aware of the fuel that I am putting in to my body. The problem isn't the amount of fuel, it's about the quality of the fuel. I wouldn't put low octane fuel into a high performance sports car, yet every day I am guilty of consuming the kind of fuel that burns me out and slows me down.

The second part of this is working out. I don't know too many people that enjoy getting up and spending an hour in the gym, on the treadmill, or lifting weights. For me this is very difficult. I started going to the gym about 3 weeks ago and already my body is in shock. In fact the gym where I work out gives new members two free training sessions (of course this is to show you the value of a personal trainer and convince you to purchase more sessions). On my second visit with my trainer, he had me work out like I have never worked out before. I felt like I was auditioning for one of those Navy Seal television shows. I understand that most of what he was teaching me is that my body is capable of so much more than my mind can conceive. The next morning I had a very personal conversation with my body. As I was lying in bed, my body gave me an ultimatum. "Don't ever do that again…" Not much of an ultimatum. I don't like negotiating with myself but my muscles were sore and my energy level was at an all time low. Quite simply, I was exhausted. I remember thinking to myself that there were going to be times when working towards my goal was not going to be enjoyable. Life is too short to spend time on things that we don't enjoy. How I was feeling in that moment was not enjoyable. Nevertheless I did what most of us do, I didn't work on achieving my goal… I stayed home.

The next time I saw my trainer, I asked him if there was anything that I could do to assist in the recovery of my muscles. His advice, "get moving and get back to the gym." I knew he was crazy, then the day following my last big workout I took his advice and got moving. I couldn't believe it, he was right I felt better the next day. I suddenly had energy again and couldn't wait for the next big workout. Sometimes in life when things get difficult, we can feel like quitting. Next time, and now I know… we just need to keep moving.

Whether your goal is to get a raise at work, pay off debt, or get back into shape. The answer is simple, you need to get moving again and keep moving. You can slow down for a breather, but don't stop. For the first few weeks, I had doubts of whether or not this was really what I wanted. I wasn't 100% committed to my goal. Even though my doubts were tiny to begin with, they were real and the soreness I was feeling reminded me of that. As we journey to our destination, it is so easy to be overwhelmed by the doubts and fears that quitting can seem to be the only option.

We have all journeyed through life. Many times we stop, halfway there, and think to ourselves this isn't going to be worth it. However, I've never met anyone that got to their destination and said that the journey wasn't worth it. These journeys could be anything. A camping trip, road trip with the family, construction project on the house, a spiritual journey, or even a journey towards your goals. I know, deep down, that this is what was needed to achieve my goal. I felt like quitting after only a couple of weeks??? You can't even call it quitting at this point because I'm not sure I ever really started. I look around at most of my friends and family and tell myself, "I'm not in that bad of shape, why do I need to work out?" The truth is that by keeping my eye on the destination I know that once I am there I will feel better, have more energy, and possibly be a motivational force for someone else to achieve their goals. On the other hand, it would be WAY EASIER to quit. People quit on themselves every single day. I wouldn't be that different…

The problem with commitment is that it is so much easier to stay focused on the little things. I was focusing on how I felt, the time requirements, and the opportunities that my time in the gym was costing me. What I need to remain focused on is the goal and the fact that I may be able to motivate others to achieve their goals as well. No one wants to learn from someone that has less success than them. So if I want to help people achieve their dreams, I need to make sure that I am capable of achieving my own first. Only then will I have the experience necessary to lead others on their own journey.

Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve. – Dr. Napoleon Hill

Vision Crashers

Vision Crasher: Anything that causes a sudden severe downturn in your vision.

It takes such a great amount of effort, not just to have vision, but to keep your vision in focus. There are many things that can interfere with your focus and I want to address the three most common.

1. Life Events

Every single one of us will experience life events that cause our vision to lose focus. Sometimes the events are truly life altering such as the death of a loved one. Or temporarily life altering… loss of a job. Sometimes they can be the little things… chores have been piling up or your family needs to spend more time with you.

All of these events can have a dramatic effect on your ability to maintain focus on your dreams. We all strive for balance in our lives and we don't want to forsake our relationships on our journey. You just need to make sure that when you stop to rest, you sit alongside the path and don't venture too far. If you stay in one place too long, you may lose sight of your destination and it can take a tremendous amount of effort to regain your focus.

The best way to overcome these life event challenges is to find someone or something that holds you accountable to your goals. This may be a best friend, family member, or mentor. If you are self-disciplined, it may be a daily Outlook reminder. Whatever you choose to hold you accountable to achieving your dreams, make sure that it is simple enough to implement immediately and that you are not responsible for it. In other words make sure that the people or systems keeping you focused are on auto pilot and if you divert from the path they will find you and put you back on track.

2. People You Are Close To

We all know someone who quit while trying to achieve their dreams. Many times this results in that person wanting to tell others about the pain endured and they feel the need to justify why others should not try. You hear phrases like: "Only 1% of people are successful at that," or "Are you sure you want to do this?" Anytime someone questions the focus of your vision, they are planting seeds of disbelief and failure. Whether or not these seeds grow into anything is ultimately up to you.

We all know people that are very comfortable with their current environment and that is fantastic. However a lot of people will justify to you why your dreams may not be worth the effort. Most of the time we hold these people in such high regard that their ability to influence our decisions is very high. Regardless of your personal goals, the unfortunate truth is that many people aren't willing to put in the amount of effort it takes to achieve their goal. The decision to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and try again is many times what separates you from your dreams. The problem comes when people try to interfere with this system by protecting you because they don't want to see you get hurt.

Every relationship of yours is unique and every relationship is going to require a different plan to achieve success. You should never try to change people to your way of thinking. You want them to respect you for your dreams and in return, you should respect them for their opinions. Just be careful whose advice you take because if you buy into their opinions, you buy into their lifestyle. The last thing you want to do is take advice from someone who is further from achieving their dreams than you are.

3. Yourself

I have seen more people be their own worst vision crasher than both of the other two combined. Experts say that it takes 21 days to create a new habit. Only 3 weeks and you will be constantly focused on your vision… if only it were that simple.

Most of us have had a vision many times in our lives. We have all had dreams that didn't come to fruition and just like touching the red hot stove, we quickly learn that failing to achieve our dreams can be painful. Quite simply it is human nature to avoid pain. Therefore, it is out of habit that we don't set our goals high enough. We second guess ourselves when things don't work out. How many times have you tried to take the next step on your journey only to go home and think to yourself "that's what I should have done / said!" We have such a lack of trust in ourselves that we are our own worst enemy when it comes to achieving our goals.

I truly believe that one of the best ways for us to learn and develop good habits is by failing. In John Maxwell's book "Failing Forward," he talks about the difference between average people and those who achieve. The theme is that those who achieve take responsibility for their actions, learn from their mistakes, understand that failure is part of the process for growth, and they persevere. Failure is nothing more than the ability to start again with more knowledge than you had the last time. Success is waiting for those willing to fail, grow in their character, and step up one more time. No one gets it right the first time, even professionals get to try again. Last time I checked, baseball players got three strikes before they were out. They also get paid millions if they hit the ball 3 out of 10 times at bat. Remember that failure is part of the game and that you need to keep focused on your vision because one of these days, you will hit the game winning home run and change your life forever.

"Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." – Winston Churchill

"Failure is the opportunity to begin again more intelligently." – Henry Ford

Vision Casters

Vision: The act or power of imagination; a mode of seeing or conceiving; unusual discernment or foresight.

 

The problem with vision is that we all have it and I'm not talking about the sense of sight. However most of us were never taught how to use it. We live in a society of instant gratification and if we can't conceive it today and have it by dinner time, we don't want it. The downside to vision is that most see it as too much work, or "pipe dreams". I speak with a lot of people about what they want from their careers and most people fall into one of two categories. Either they don't want anything more from their career or they do but because no one has ever taught them how to use their imagination, they have no idea exactly what they want or have the foggiest idea of how to get there. This is precisely when you will need someone to help you cast your vision.

 

Casting vision is nothing more than being specific about your dreams and goals. It is the process by which the track is laid for you to run on as you chase your dreams. Many times you meet a mentor that has achieved similar goals to yours and they help you lay that track. However for most of us, myself included, your own best mentor is your willingness to persevere. Many of the things I want to achieve were achieved by people that I currently don't have the opportunity of meeting. However many of them have written books or magazine articles on how they accomplished their goals. In my opinion, this is some of the best forms of mentoring most of us can obtain as we start to lay down our track. On the other hand, finding a mentor may be as simple as sitting down with your pastor at church or your boss. The only qualifying factor I would suggest is that this person have a character that you admire or respect. There is nothing worse than finding a mentor who does not share the same values as you.

Mentors are very valuable in your journey to achieve your goals, however they are not the only way for you to cast vision on your dreams. There are two other very positive ways to cast vision for yourself. I will break this down into the tangible and intangible. Tangibles are the things that you get to have as a result of achieving your dreams. Ask yourself – What will my life look like to others once I have achieved my dreams? What kind of car will I drive? What neighborhood will I live in? What stores will I shop at? Where will I vacation? What kind of hobbies will I enjoy? All of these questions are in support of casting your own vision. For many of us, this may be enough and we can start right here. We can burn the fire hot enough to make our vision shine and put our dreams in the spotlight. However since we all have the desire to be internally fulfilled, we now must consider the intangible.

Intangibles are those things which cannot be measured by others. This is the personal joy and satisfaction you receive from achieving your goals and living out your dreams. Questions you would ask yourself: What level of personal fulfillment will I have for achieving my goals? (For some of us this will be enough as many of us were taught to go to school, get a job, and work until we retire. We were told to stop day dreaming. This usually happens right around the time that our dreams become good enough to start telling others about them.) What kind of friends will I have? Will I have a family? If you already have a family, what kind of relationships will I have with them? What will my relationship with God be like, will I reconnect or start a new journey with Him? Will I support the church with my time or money? Many people find greater personal achievement by fulfilling their intangible goals. They find higher levels of excitement by the tangibles. Whatever your dreams are, there are no right or wrong answers to any of these questions. And no requirement for creating balance. They are merely a way for you to become your own vision caster.

 

The Plan

One way to cast your own vision immediately is to create a Vision Board. This is nothing more than an exercise in laying down the track for you to run towards your dreams.

Things you will need:

• Poster Board
• BIG stack of magazines (the BIGGER, the BETTER)
• Glue – rubber cement is best (it won't wrinkle the pictures)

This will take some time, especially if you don't have magazines at home. You can get them from the library, hair salons, or your doctor's office. Or spend some time at the bookstore browsing magazines. As you see pictures of the things, both tangible and intangible, that you desire pick up these magazines. Take them home and plan an hour or two for arts and craft. Cut out pictures, arrange them in a collage, and create your story. This is your vision for where you are going and if the light shines bright enough you won't lose sight of it. Now hang this up where you will see it often, better yet where others will see it too. They will help you focus on your vision as questions are asked about your vision board. You will probably be surprised how many of your friends have the same goals as you and you may even find an accountability partner to make sure you stay running on your track, don't take shortcuts, or rest for too long.

 

Regardless of what motivates you to achieve your goals, knowing what they are is the key ingredient to any success plan. I would hate to hear that you feel like you never succeeded because you really didn't know when you got there. Know your goals, make sure others know your goals, and let everyone know once you have achieved them. The more you keep others involved in your vision, the more likely they will keep you on track. Keep your vision in focus and your eye on the prize. Your journey will be simpler if you know the destination and don't have time to concentrate on all the obstacles in your way.

 

A Word of Warning!!!

Just as there are techniques and mentors who are vision casters, be careful of vision crashers. I'll tell you how to avoid those in my next post.